Lost

So, my sweet dream

Here we are again.

You know the words I wish I could say, 

They are carved into your heart

As they are burned into my soul

Maybe is such a terrible curse. 

We held each other’s eyes as though we could change the reality, we hoped and knowing the answers never mattered. 

Your sweet smile was a cold fire on that forgotten landscape, clear and simple we prayed, our movements echoed through eternity as we imagined what might have been forever, what could never be one day, that anchor cut loose and we drifted away from our only chance. 

If time had a pen, we would have maps and the journey would always take us home, we would dance in front of bonfires and the chanting mother’s would bless the rebirth of winter with a sacrifice freely offered and accepted by the ancient. 

If, maybe, these ideas are not as hard as truth, these thoughts do not provide a loving touch. 

Here we are, my sparkling sapphire. 

We have limits and rules for our insanity, we have stolen the fire from the mountain and left in its place a key with no lock. 

In uncertainty have these words stripped my skin from bones too old to grow. 

Belief has borrowed flavors, and we taste the memories of what has never come. 

Your love will decode my cypher and you will know my cruelty. I have chosen a road away from our Paradise, you will wait with no name for the return of visions lost in pieces. 

I will secure the gates behind my hands, so that none will know my betrayal. 

I know, and you know. 

First


From the moment of first awareness until death, I only get to see life from one perspective. 

It’s the same for you, no matter how empathetic you may be, no matter how understanding, you can never truly know what others think. Just what they say, what they do. All of that is interpreted by your mind, colored by your experiences, your emotions, so the truth is
there is not one TRUTH
everyone gets their own version
Knowing this doesn’t make much difference, right?  We still have to interact with each other, to see ourself. I am formless without confirmation. There is a balance to be found, between how I perceive myself, and how you see me, and in the middle lies all of human history, societal standards, religion, politics, and all the other devices invented by humans. We are taught how to act, how to pretend to be a part of the collective. We are criticized and degraded when we step outside of the accepted norms, we are punished for shining our own light, instead of dimming to the lowest common denominator.
I ask of you a simple question, without an easy answer:

Can you, will you

put yourself first on your own list?

Some will say it’s selfish, and somehow wrong. 

I wonder, if you do not put yourself first, if you always take care of another’s want before your own need, 

who will put you first? 

Is there another you, who will come to take care of your wants, while you see to someone else, and so on? 
I can only live my life,walk my path, I can only see through my eyes. 

It’s the same for you. 

I want you to just consider for a moment,

being yourself. 

I know that put up your defenses, saying that. What do I know about you? How could I say you are anything other than yourself?
What could I possibly know about hiding ?
Day by day,you bite down on the words you wanted to say. You stop yourself from showing the way you feel. You hide away that child that still lives inside you. You clamp down on the “foolish dreams” or ” silly feelings” or any of the cruel labels we put around our hearts. 
Can you understand that nobody speaks for you, if you remain silent.

Nobody else can feel your feelings, nobody else can stand up to your attackers, and degraders, and conformers, nobody is going to save you from the costume you’ve put yourself into. 
What do you look like, in your mind? In your heart? What did you want to be, when you were eight years old? When did you give up, and allow ” the rules ” to paint you to look just like everyone else?
It’s such a silly thing to say, You are unique, just like everyone else, but it’s true. 

At least, in my version of life, it’s true. 
I want you to do something today, that is only for you. Do something, say something, BE something, that is only for you. If you feel the desire, and see an opportunity, encourage someone else to do the same. 
Love ya, kid.

Eyes, Skies, Lies


 
It’s okay if you feel like these are just words on a screen, and if that obscures the obscene from your mental regime than I cannot fault your resolve and try to topple your walls, if it’s somethin strange in your neighborhood and you don’t call Ghostbusters than I’m not sure we can really connect. 
So. I see a lowered flag waving from your heart, and I want to help it fly boldly and proudly, to stand true and strong and somehow find light in private imagined darkened rooms, pre-emptively constructed tombs of doubt and despair, to climb up the ladders and fly up the stairs no matter how the stares and the glares might pierce you and demean, your challenges accepted, you are coming clean.
] tell me what you need
And I will provide
When they read of my love for her they look above her but none could ever be supreme to her she is my queen to serve and my life is what she deserves to burn if she wants fire I’m fuel, an uncontested duel of whatever you want and what I’m willing to do, but I would sell my child’s organs for you because my skies are all lies covering a thin disguise and my eyes cannot pry from locked doors and closed minds what truth in my life I should not leave behind.  
i can’t say anything anymore without thinking of how it sounds, 
 
is there a gentle touch inside us all which might propel some form emotional evolution, some type of redistribution of values and ideas which have been seen to be false; perhaps on a cold day all men shiver, and time is a package which never remains undelivered, but the hearts of all creatures are designed with a purpose, to live the next fraction of a second before your life muscles contract, every breath is gone with no guarantee of payback.
At times I think the whole world has gone crazy and at times I know there is no world or any crazy which is crazier than the thought of a placebo effect and we still won’t believe that we are what we perceive…is there any sense to any of these insane pursuits which scuff up our boots and leave us bereft, clinging to the small pieces left from the last time we loved and got broken again. 
someday all the doubts that live in my head will be silenced for good and I will believe what I cannot deny. 
Maybe.

From Sea to Shining Hipocrisy


A long time ago, 
In a galaxy far, far away… 
The time has passed with no sign of progress, our beloved nation of freedom and principles has become a literal charnel house of horrors.  
The United States of America was, honestly, founded on hypocrisy. Slave owners that did not recognize the humanity of women or any ethnic group not descended from European stock spoke of the equality of all men, with back door deals and secret handshakes. 
To be free of British taxation and rule the colonial Americans fought, and mythology was born in the form of historical fairytales. George Washington never chopped down that cherry tree and confessed his sin. Thomas Jefferson is commonly represented as a pillar of Liberty, yet the man owned and used his slaves, people of color who did not own the bodies they lived in, Andrew Jackson enacted the genocide of almost all native people who had lived mostly peacefully for a few thousand years, from sea to shining sea. 
Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves, but only in half-measures. The newly freed slaves were legally counted as three-fifths of a person. I’m not sure what sixty percent of a person looks like, but I’m reasonably sure that it isn’t a human with equal rights. 
A hundred years after the Civil War, equality was still a lie told to the populace of this country. It took impossible efforts and lost lives to push the Civil Rights Act of 1964 through legislative process, to force the bigots and racists working for local and state governments to allow some small measure of legal equality to people not called “white”. 
Fifty years have passed since that legislation was ratified and still racism runs rampant, not just in small towns and the ‘Deep South’ but throughout this entire nation.  
The back door deals have never been dissolved. Families like the Rothschilds and Rockefellers still own everything, including the governing bodies and courts. Elections are held as a pretense to appease the ignorant masses. No real change has been made. Oligarchy has moved out of the shadows into common knowledge and the idea of freedom has been willingly sacrificed for convenience and supposed safety.
You may read this and call me a conspiracy theorist, or an idiot, or any number of slurs and insults.  
You may read this and agree with all that I say, but shrug and say, 
“What can one person do?” 
One person, that’s all I am. I have studied and I have researched and I guarantee you I do not have all of the truth, all of the story, and I certainly do not have all of the answers. 
What I have is hope.  
I hope that you can see that skin color, sexual preference and religious affiliation do not determine the worth of a person. 
I hope that you can see past your programmed prejudices, your traditional values, your ingrained impulses to behold the humanity in every person, and recognize that no group of people is defined by any one characteristic. We are all individuals, we are all unique and we all have the ability to adapt to new conditions. It is that adaptability which propelled humanity above and outside the natural order, it placed us outside the food chain, it established us as the ultimate animal. 
It is adaptability we need, more than ever before. We must see that our path is headed toward the Hell spoken of so glibly by bible-pushers. This planet has the resources to support all of us, yet we are allowing a tiny percentage of us to rule everything, to own everything, to discard humans in a never-ending game of Risk, or Monopoly. 
When will we realize that we are many, we are strong, and our only hope is to join together?
I am not the first to say this, and I hope I will not be the last. 
We must reconfigure our paradigm, we must embrace each other and stop our Hellbound march. The only chance we have is to adapt to our new conditions, namely, the eternally connected world which offers the entirety of human knowledge at the touch of a button. 
We must stand, together, now.  
We have the ability, we have the opportunity, we have the desire for a better world.  
There is a change coming,  
(like always) 
There is a new reality approaching.  
The only question is, 
Will we adapt?  
Will you?  
I hope so.  

………………….